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Today, Philip and Andrea - who are getting married on June 27 - invited me and Kent to go hiking with them. We drove to Bellingham (on the Chuckanut Highway - yes, that is its real name) and hiked the Fragrance Lake Trail. It was some much needed physical activity coupled with fun and good conversation with great friends.

About half way up the trail, we stopped by the view point that over looked the Puget Sound. Beautiful. And a time for silly pics.



Everything was beautiful and lush.


At the end of the trail - by Fragrance Lake...which really wasn't all that fragrant and really wasn't all that impressive - we stopped for some lunch.

The whole hike took us about 2 1/2 hours including stopping for food. Minus our aching muslces, we felt pretty good about it. A good, fun day.

Our small group meets every Sunday. We have studied "Faith and Doubt" by John Ortberg, the book of Matthew, a series of lectures by N.T. Wright and now we are going to start on "Simply Christian" by N.T. Wright next Sunday. Last night, however, we had a fun night - a night to fellowship, laugh, eat and play. We ate brats and smores over the fire, played ultimate frisbee and ended the night by watching The Curious Case of Benjamin Button. It was a blast.

Here are a few pics from the evening:

Kent and I had dinner with Jeff and Denise. Denise is Kent's cousin and was my sister's suite-mate at Calvin (small world, eh?). They had a beautiful baby girl 10 weeks ago - a true gift from God.

Beautiful Jaedyn:

Almost two years ago I moved across the country, leaving everything I've ever known - all the comforts of home. One of the hardest things I've ever had to do. The last three Sundays we have been listening to a series on the calling of the Spirit. I have to admit, although they have been really good, full-of-scriptural-truth sermons, they have been difficult for me to hear. I don't want to hear them...because I know they're true. I'm hearing a message that I don't want to believe to be true.

Ever since I moved here, I've been looking, hoping and praying for a way back to Michigan - not necessarily because I of Lynden itself (although that is part of it) - but mainly because I can't imagine living my life away from my precious family for the rest of my life. The Sunday dinners, the birthday parties, camping at Muskegon State Park every summer, TVSC, the summers, the thunderstorms, the fireflies and crickets...the list could go on and on.... Especially now with my mom struggling with breast cancer, I question why God has me here and not there when I could be of help - when I could be present in that situation, not only for myself, but for them, too.

But God has been patiently teaching me that that may not be his will for me.

And I have to be ok with that.

A good friend of mine recently lent me a book called Let Go by Fénelon. I haven't finished it yet, but the other day while I was reading, a couple sentences really convicted me:

"Do you fear that He may not be able to supply to you from Himself that help which He may have taken away on the human level? And why does He take human help away, except to supply you from Himself, and to purify you by the painful lesson?" (p.7)

Gulp.

That's humbling. Basically, by not being content with where God has me right now or with what he has called me to do - by longing for that which he's currently taken away from me - I'm not trusting that he will provide me with just what I need to do what he has called me to do. In our sermon today, Pastor Tom challenged our congregation by saying that we have turned Christianity into a 'convenience religion.' Being a Christian means following the Spirit wherever and whenever he calls...and most of the time, that means doing things that are inconvenient to us...things that cause our lives to be interrupted from the norm we had planned out for ourselves.

A ministry of inconvenience.

We tend to quickly spout out that we love God, we want him to use us, we want to glorify his name, we want people to see God working in and through us - but as soon as we are called to do something or go through circumstances that are not what we bargained for or something that interrupts that plans WE had for ourselves, we say, "Sorry, God - I'll follow you wherever you call me...except in that area." We cop out.

Didn't I learn that lesson the first time when God brought my family through divorce that, although divorce sucks, God loves me and my family and will bring beauty from ashes? Did I not learn that lesson when my brother almost got killed in a car accident on Thanksgiving morning...when Sonny and Mike struggled for years to have a baby, and now they have two beautiful girls...when I doubted that I would ever find the person God wanted me to marry...and now I'm married to my wonderful husband.... Each of these situations brought so many tears...so much questioning...so much pain...yet in the end, brought so much joy. God knew best in every single one of the above circumstances. The list could go on.

Why is it so hard to trust even when we KNOW that God has been faithful, is faithful, and WILL BE faithful? WE KNOW that. Why do we, like the Israelites, seem to so easily forget...?

I have been feeling convicted lately that I need to stop thinking about the future - stop hoping that my will will be done, and start praying for God to form my heart into his - my mind to be transformed to be more like his - my will to be conformed to his.

Even if it is inconvenient - even if it is not MY will...I will choose to follow.

Lord, give me the strength.

My mom had a doctors appointment today (and one yesterday and one tomorrow). From what I understand, they are currently testing the lump that they removed last week in order to figure out the best way to treat my mom. Since they found (during surgery) that the cancer was beginning to go into her chest muscle, it became a high probability that she would need to have either radiation or chemo - a huge bummer. Well, it looks like they are leaning towards some type of chemo. I was quite surprised when mom told me that...but I guess that there is around a 20% chance that the cancer could return later in her life - but in a not-so-good location - so, if they do chemo now, there is a much lower chance of the cancer returning. That is a positive.

Obviously our family (including my mom) wants the best for my mom - we want her to have the best success against this horrible disease as possible. If that means chemo...then ok. Yet, it is still difficult to take in, especially when this option wasn't even originally in our radar.

Pray for my mom as she continues in the healing process.
Pray for our whole family as we wait to hear the results of the tests (including me...not only waiting to hear the news, but from a distance of over 2,000 miles).
Pray for wisdom and discernment for the doctors that they will make the best decision on behalf of my mom and her health.

God is in control. We rest in that knowledge.

JSB @ JJFry's in Sumas - May 1, 2009
Theme: Night at the Emmys
Juniors and seniors entered the building on a red carpet while sophomores, dressed like paparazzi, took pictures of them. It was a fun night.

Our family got good news last week. Here's an email my mom sent out to our family:

Hello, friends and family,

I received the pathology report from my surgery last Thursday. At my post-op appointment with Dr. Ford today, he let Sonny and I know that NO CANCER was found in the lymph nodes!!! Nor was there any in the muscle tissue margins they had taken!!! Sonny and I rejoiced in the news and thanked the Doctor for all he has done.

"Praise the Lord, oh my soul, and all that is within me praise his holy name! Praise the Lord, oh my soul, and forget not all his benefits. Who forgives all you sins and heals all your diseases. Who redeems your life from the pit and crowns you with love and compassion..." Psalm 103

There is still a chance of followup radiation or other treatment, but that will depend on what a radiation oncologist (to be assigned later) will determine.

Thank you all for your concern and prayers for me and my family. May the Lord receive the honor and glory.

Blessings to you all,
Char